The most important part of Parenting well

>>  Sunday, October 28, 2012

This one line, taken from my recent Parenting Course,  says it all for me

The small consistencies of every day add up.

I have always had a clear 'no is no', 'yes is yes' and 'maybe' is I'm up for negotiation.  I have always tried not to jump to a no, to be sure to ask questions, to allow negotiation to play a part.  Hard with a young child but sometimes possible, much easier with a teenager if you are prepared to consider yourself to be a counsellor not a conductor in this parenting game.

The small consistencies of every day do add up.  The politeness, saying nice things, time spent together, asking how a day went, that kiss on the head as they leave for the day or at least a shout through the bedroom door that you are leaving and you would find it pleasing if they emerged from their bed before you got home from work.

Sometimes it's hard to be consistent, sometimes it's easier to throw yourself down on the sofa and declare wine is the only thing to cure the day you've had, that a rush around in the morning is easier than a breakfast together.  Sometimes life happens but small things are exactly that and don't take much effort.

Small stones create big ripples, ripples that roll far and wide.  The family morals and consistencies you give to your children today will be their morals and guides of the future.  Take care you show them the ones you actually want them to carry through life.


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