Quiet tears in the Aisles

>>  Wednesday, December 03, 2014

This week's gallery is babies

Many of you will know, from my 10 years of sharing, that one of my biggest regrets in life is not being able to have any more children.

I tried for many years, HWMBO was not as committed to the cause and the maintenance of his health to help matters along.  I am fairly bitter about it to a degree.  But mostly I am just sad.

Shopping is as depressing as cleaning toilets in my book and when I get to the baby aisle and breath in deep the smell of Johnsons, clean baby, fresh wrapped in a towel baby, cuddle it up close and snuggle baby....it hurts.

I'm sure the supermarkets are used to middle aged women, beige and invisible to most of the world, breaking down in the aisles.  Each with their own personal weight of sadness.

Each with a tale to tell (or keep buried deep) of loss or hurt, tiredness or ill health, of difficult times or strained marriage, of teenage terrors or empty nesters.

And with my weight of sadness I will breathe in one more time and brush away a quiet, discreet tear and laugh at the cuteness of the tiny socks hanging nearby, smile at the mum pushing a trolley full of nappies and wink and wave at the baby with her.

And move on leaving a huge amount of pain hanging, until next time.


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