The importance of being beautiful

>>  Saturday, March 03, 2012

What's more important : The fun you have whilst getting ready to go out or the end result?

COG was invited to what can only be described as the party of the year.  The joint birthday party of a number of it girls in her year.  Photos of dresses that were to be worn were flourishing Facebook, hairdressers appointments were booked, heels the height I'm not comfortable wearing were bought.  Not for COG - remember these girls are just turning 13.   We plumped for a BHS dress that suited her shape, a pair of ballet pumps and me to do her hair just before she dashed off to a band practise and then straight onto friends house to 'get ready'.

One part of me wanted to keep her at home.  To do her hair properly, to do proper makeup, to prim and preem and double check her.

The other part of me just wanted her to have a damned good time.  She did.

Her and friend took photos of themselves having a girly giggle getting dressed up.  Her hair wasn't perfect, her make up was, well, suited to a 13 year old and she had a fantastic time.

I'm so pleased I didn't make a fuss and just let her do what she wanted to do.  If she learns now to take the way she looks as being the most important thing it could become the backbone of her life.  Where would that lead her?

To a life time of mirrors? Plastic Surgery? Who wants to be partnered to a man where the whole relationship is based on looks?

I recall being dumped once because I'd 'grown fat', should I have dieted to keep him?....hell no!

I also refuse to climb rocks in high heels, and I would like my daughter to feel the same way.

Oh I can scrub up, but I don't need to do it to be self satisfied and I don't want my daughter's self confidence to be based on looks either.  We'll build our house on rock not sand.

Spending all day in a hairdressers having a colour and being 'volumised' at the age of 13 lays the foundations for a self critical future.

Beauty shifts, body's change...puberty, babies, ageing.

Inner self happiness is not fed skin deep.  It comes from fun, friends, family, self belief, the will to try, to achieve....

You go through storms in life and you don't know how long they will last, you can't build your harbours on shifting sands.


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