My patience is an elastic band

>>  Thursday, November 07, 2013

My patience gland is an elastic band which may be sometimes inextricably linked directly to my uterus, but don't you dare ask me if I have my period whilst I'm yelling, ok.

Sooooooo, if my stretchy patience band is already rather taut then there's not much slack left to play with people. A week where a chmod 750 / spilled off my rooty finger tips if you don't understand this, just believe it's a bad thing to do is going to be a taut band week. Especially when I'd thrown up twice at work just before said mistake happened and I got my period that afternoon.

Sooooo, I pick up the home phone to:

"This is Sainsburys ringing about your home grocery delivery, but before I go on I need to take you through some security"
"Can you tell me your phone number"
"That'll be the one you just rang"
"Yes, can you tell me the number"
"You want me to tell you the number you just dialled so you can tell that I'm the person you think I am, do you see the flaw in that logic"
"It's for security"
"Security isn't really in this ball park today is it, I'm not playing this game."
"This isn't a game madam,this is Sainsburys ringing about your grocery order, but I need to go through security first"
"Go on then, ask me a security question"
"Can you tell me the phone number"
"Nope,  have a real hard think about what you might ask me that only the person you rang might know"
After being put on hold for a while, he came back
"What's the email address registered against the account?"
Well, it was a better effort, so I told him.
"Thank you, you'll be pleased to hear I calling to tell you about an offer we have on for your delivery slot........"

I wonder if my band had not already been new knicker elastic tight, would I have cut him just a little bit of slack?

 How about British Gas, a company sent to try the patience of saints. I rang to book my boiler service as there was only one date coming up on line for the following month.
"Yes madam, that's the only slot available"
"In the next 6 weeks you only have one date available for a service"
"Servicing is not our priority madam"
"You don't say that in your advertising or when I pay you, what next date have you got?"
"The end of Dec, we are very busy madam"

Maybe you would like to hear the tale of the Rangers at the planning meeting where we openly discussed whether they wanted to meet in half term.  "yes, yes, definitely" they said.  4 weeks later 2 of them can't remember being at the planning meeting but are on holiday at half term.  4 more do remember being at the meeting but have also now informed me they are on holiday.  Of all the girls at the planning meeting, only one now is able to come....Cog.


And so endeth yet another day with another snapped patience band.  It heals over night, it gets a fresh start most days. You would have thought that across the years it would have flexed sufficiently to give infinite stretch, it seems not, it is not a muscle strengthened by use.

I'm going to quote old Baden-Powell again:

"Patience has more to do with the success than almost any other quality except honesty of purpose"

I am sadly found lacking, oh I start with good intentions every time, I feel the rise of the irritation, the bite of annoyance and my reasoning side tries to understand, tries to ask 'does this really matter'.  And then I hear the words extending from my mouth "I don't belieeeeeeeve it" - well actually, it's usually FFS but what's a few swear words amongst friends.

It seems that I have become Victor Meldrew, although part of me suspects I always was.

I relate so much better to this.

Than this.

But I hope, should I reach a fine old age, that like a fine wine, I may start to mature.


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