Why are parents so damned embarrassing?

So daughter and friend were booked into a Centre Parcs 90 minute cupcake decorating class.

If, as a parent of a toddler you think you get precious little time alone, wait until you have a teen and find out you get none unless you let them lie I'm bed all day and even then they will popup at precisely the wrong time. Sooooo 90 mins was ours, all ours.....or so we thought.

'Come back after an hour' said the master decorator who looked no older than many of my Rangers 'it's a small class, we may finish early'.  I gave her the full force of my 'for God's sake relieve me of these teens for the full time look' to no avail. But heyho we don't do tantric so we cycled back to the chalet to find the maid in the process of changing the sofa covers and not looking like she was going anywhere else fast.

Giving up on the idea of sex what else is there to do but loaf around and cause a nuisance.  I relate very well to teen culture.

It was (un)fortunate that the cupcake class was in a room with 2 glass walls. It was even more (un)fortunate that the master decorator had her back to the glass wall whilst COG and friend faced it.

It started with the simple wave and thumbs up but once you've had that first hit high you need more for the thrill.  A few 'face pressed against the glass gurns' weren't enough.  A shuffle past the class room.  A fully fledged running race back and we were ready to sand dance. HWMBO and I were a coordinated dream....

....at which point I realised Starbucks also has an open wall and we were being watched from both sides.

COG was mortified.

This is her best  'why can't you just behave or be like normal parents' look.  Perfect for this week's Gallery 'expressions'.

 

Well firstly I don't do normal, never have. Normal makes me feel caged. But my desire to be spotty car'd, all dancing in the supermarket, singing at the bus stop, talking on the tube blimey rebellious or what mortifies COG more and more every year. I've explained over and over that all parents are embarrassing and at least I give her good reason instead of just bog standard teen self consciousness but its still not cutting the mustard.

 

She really should have had me adopted.