That cat will be the death of me

>>  Thursday, July 31, 2014

I've been having a difficult time with my little cat.

 I have a big cat, that goes nowhere, would get a gold medal in sleeping and she falls over at your feet a lot.  She's an easy maintenance, as a cat should be, cat.
 And I have Maisy.
 Maisy is, to be frank, a pain in the arse.

She is very clever and very sociable.

She spends a lot of time at the village hall doing playschool, karate, theatre group, hula, yoga.

She's been to church, she's been to school.  I've had calls from far and wide to fetch her.
Yes, people think it's really cute to be followed by a cat and encourage her with a chuck under the chin and then realise they can't get rid of her!


I was on holiday once and got a call at about 1am from a guy who had been followed by her, bless him, when I explained where we were he took her back to our close.  I've no idea how her managed to not be followed back home again!  She will go missing for days on end.  She has been shut up in buildings where I have heard her crying and had to go find the people with the keys.  But mostly I know where she disappears to.

There is an old lady who encourages her in, feeds her, lets her cuddle up in front of her fire and then when she's had enough of it she rings me and says 'I can't get rid of your damned cat and she's coming into my house all the while and I can't stop her.'  


I have told her to stop feeding her, I've asked her to stop encouraging her, I've even offered her ownership and vets bills, apparently that made me the rudest person she has ever spoken to.

She reported me to the RSPCA for animal cruelty.  She rings up at midnight and tells me to go to collect the cat because it's too late to let her out alone.  She leaves nasty messages on my answering machine.  She always calls my landline and withholds her number so I can't block her calls. If Cog answers the phone she shouts at Cog.  If I go round to collect Maisy, she won't answer the door.  She will answer it to HWMBO, but he works away a lot.

Maisy has a collar and an id tag, it has my mobile number on it.  The woman never rings that number, I assume because she doesn't know how to withhold her own number if she does that.  She has got other people to ring up and tell me that my cat is round there.  The last person to call told me that a cat is not a dog, that I can't control it and it can go where it likes (in-congruent to the constant requests to collect her).  I suggested that either the woman stops feeding Maisy or starts paying her vets bills.  She hung up.

I love my little Maisy.  There is no cat more spoilt (when she is at home!)  The RSPCA and my vet thought it preposterous that I had been reported.  They both told me to tell the woman to spray Maisy with water to stop her going into her house.  The woman said that was cruelty and would not do it.

She has finally broken me, I have changed my home phone number and taken on all the pain that goes along with that rather than have to keep dealing with this.  I just can't stand it any longer. I'm at my wits end with it.

I can't keep Maisy shut in, she goes loopy, she darts for the doors, she's brought down my blinds, bent my venetians, she can open some internal doors, she can open the locked cat flap.  Seriously, she has worked out that by tapping it gently she can create a bounce and catch her paw underneath it and lift it upward.

WITS END.

Bless Bob Martins today, who sent me a parcel full of goodies to help me pamper my already over spoilt kitty a little more.  See the rub downs, they are so cool for wiping grass stains off white paws (she has 1 white paw and 3 grey!)  And the new collar, did they know that Maisy loses on average 1 collar every 3 weeks and each time they cost me about £8 (collar, cat flap magnet, id tag).  They are often pushed through my letter box by strangers that find them though!

I'm wondering the next time I get reported to the RSPCA whether to ask them what pushed the reporter to do it, was it the 6 monthly vet checkups, the new collars. the clean litter tray, the healthy diet, the glossy coat or the snack treating that finally made them think that I was a bad owner!

I love my little kitty, truly I do but I swear the next time I want to get a cat I'm off to Battersea and asking them for their sleepiest, slowest, saggiest cat they have.  Yes, yes, the fat one in the corner that doesn't want to move - yup, I'll take it!




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