Stop all the clocks

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.

We are still doing Christmas stuff and life marches on.


But I feel like a spectator.  Not actually doing but watching myself doing it.

That probably makes no sense to anyone apart from me.





 I thought once the Christmas post for the Scouts was done and we had our last Ranger meeting I was pretty much finished Guiding until camp.  But it turns out I had been given a bag packing slot at a local supermarket and they had forgotten to tell me.  So the Saturday before Christmas (and the days running up to it) was spent cajoling and organising, then a day of bag packing.  We raised lots of money, it was worth it.  I painted a smile on my face and had some amazing support and I watched myself cope.

A Ranger that left for university in September came to pack with us for 4 out of the 6 hours, she knew I needed the moral support and she gave up her time for me.  She's a lovely girl.

The last uniform wearing of this year was our Rainbow Leaders funeral.  I  watched myself traverse that today.  Maybe now the fog will start to clear.

There were over 20 uniformed past and present Guiders there including the County and Regional Commissioners.  She would have been totally humbled by them being there.  They came a long way on Christmas Eve to pay their respects.

The first uniformed event of the year will be our winter camp.  The last time we were there our Rainbow Leader camped with us.  

Facing Guiding things at the moment is hard.  But it is also where a lot of people that support me most are.  

I also received some very upsetting news about one of my Rangers this week.  It is an issue that I will need to try and help tackle, I'm not sure how yet and I think it is going to be a long and difficult journey.

I can only give thanks that myself, HWMBO and Cog are all well and not facing the challenges that others around us are facing at the moment.

I hope your challenges this Christmas are more about turkey cooking times than empty chairs and that your holiday is a succulent feast of fun.